A bit of this, a bit of that - and a lot of music
The barnacles were heavy on the bottom of the boat. As he was removing them, Bill the Bosun wondered if English scientists would ever discover his secret. He knew that Swedish mathematicians had almost found out what he had been hiding all these years, but wasn't sure about the scientists in England. If they knew Bill's last name was Higgs, he'd be sunk. He wouldn't be able to hide any longer. He'd have to own up, and admit....
The phone rang.
"Hello. Is that Bill the Bosun?"
"This is Betty Bilger. I'm a reporter from the Barabass Bending Blighter. Can I ask a couple of quick questions?"
"I've made some enquiries and discovered that you run a company called the Bosun Tannery. Is that correct?"
"And how long have you run the Bosun Tannery?"
"It's been in my family for two hundred years."
"Excellent. Thanks for clearing that up. And just one more thing: is your last name Higgs?"
Bill sighed. He knew this day would come.
"And do you have a particle belonging to English scientists?"